20 Reasons for Keeping “Don’t Ask / Don’t Tell”
I had a very good instructor when I took History in college. In fact, he wrote the text book. One interesting thing I learned in this class was that times don’t, in fact, change. We do not move in a progressive line where things continue to grow more liberal and progressive. In fact, American history is much like a pendulum that swings back and forth in cycles that are pretty much the same number of years ever since the very beginning during colonial times. One has to be a dedicated historian to find this out because during the conservative times, it seemed people would not tell their kids about the mistakes made during the more liberal times. You might be surprised to know that temporary marriages were once tried during colonial times. That did not quite work out. And then things changed back and if you look at the condition of daily life during the time just prior to the American Revolution you will see that there were a large percentage of unwed mothers.
And now I have people telling me that times have changed and soon the military will soon remove the “Don’t Ask / Don’t Tell” policy. Gay Rights Advocates point to the fact that woman are so accepted in the military around the world that they even serve on submarines in the Sweden (I am not sure if that is correct or not) and gays openly serve I the military in the UK. Well, times change. But while technology marches forward, history has shown that liberal ides come and go. Just because something seems like a good idea today does not mean that in the future we will regret it.
History has also shown that relaxed social norms have not been a good idea for a military. People who I have met who served in Vietnam credit the fact that the Viet Cong was exceptionally focused and disciplined and dedicated as a key factor in the Americans eventually losing the war. You may say that times have changed since then and our new modern high-tech military can undo any foe on earth now. I would not be so sure. The Romans had such confidence in themselves and they were taken down by barbarians.
With this in mind, I would like to tell you why I think it is wrong for the “Don’t Ask / Don’t Tell” policy to be done away with. But first, let me say that I do not consider myself to be homophobic. In fact, I am for gay marriage. That is a subject for another BLOG. Besides, what does the word “homophobic” really mean? Is there something to fear from homosexuals? I don’t think so. I have expressed the ideas in this BLOG before and it is an easy strawman argument to make by labeling me something to easy brush me aside just because I am saying something that some people do not want to hear. It is laughable that people accused me of being gay when I said I supported gay marriage and they call me homophobic because I don’t think it is a good idea for open gays to be accepted in the military.
The military exists to kill and destroy. It is not fair. It is not unbiased. It is prejudicial.
If it was not prejudiced, I do not see how they could conduct war.
Individual soldiers have rights only to the extent that their officers decide they have. In boot camp, drill instructors and Petty Officers can legally do anything to you apart from physically striking you, and I understand once they could do that as well.
Black people were integrated not because of public pressure but because of the military’s own study on IQ scores. When the found that the average IQ scores of black people in Detroit were higher than the average white person from the south, they decided that integration would be a good thing. I know what you might be thinking. Civilian history seems to cite other factors in pressuring the military to integrate. But I got my facts from the proverbial horse’s mouth when I was serving in the military. If my facts are invalid, it really does not matter because what is important is this is what the military believes is true. They believe that they were not forced to adapt. They believe that they chose to adapt.
Try to understand this. The military does not function like a company that gets paid to make a product. Their myopic view is to win a war. They do not want to add any ingredients to the recipe unless it is a new weapon that can go faster and make a bigger explosion.
On the surface, it seems wrong and unjust and discriminatory for open gays to be barred from serving in the military.
Sure it is unfair. What has ever been fair about war?
I can think of twenty reasons why open and active gays should be banned from enlisting in the armed forces.
#1. Tradition. On the aircraft carrier, where ever you went there was someone cleaning. Someone is always scrubbing and polishing and washing some part of the ship. It is this way to this extent because it has been this way for the last 400 years. Why not change this obsessive degree of cleaning on ships? It is because of tradition mostly but it is also because of the ol’ saying “if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it”. It has been this way for a long time. It has worked. Why force a change? Only by extreme force would the military change. It is not a democracy. It is a war machine that needs to keep running the way it has.
The relentless cleaning is just one example. You can be sent to the brig on a war ship for the same offenses that have been the rules for the last 400 years. And, yes, they still have three days bread and water as a punishment on an aircraft carrier as well as any ship in the military.
Let me be clear and address some of my detractors here. I am not saying that “Tradition” is a good reason why things should remain the way they are. But, at the same time, it is a reason. Americans, for some reason, resist change. In fact, it is the same reason why the United States did not adopt the metric system and why whenever there is a new currency, it never seems to catch on. In our culture, for better or for worse, we Americans for some reason do not like change and open gays serving in the military is a huge change.
Swedish navy has women serving on submarines. That is not to say that we will adapt that tradition. I have found that relationships between men and women and attitudes towards homosexuality vary wildly in different cultures.
#2. Questionable Motivation. Human beings are sexual creatures that shy away from anything out of the ordinary. Sex is a huge motivation for why animals do what they do. Human beings are animals. Young men who want to toughen-up and become more worldly often join the military to become more macho but also to serve their country. Women also have admitted to me that they joined the navy to get a husband. So straight men might very well suspect that a gay guy joined the military to be surrounded by man candy. In the fox holes where your life is on the line, you will want to think that the men around you are there for the love of their country, not for their adoration of men. You would want to think that people are focused on the mission and the job and not at all focused on you — not at all. Someone commented that they resented what they assumed was my using the stereotype that gay men are obsessed and with sex. Gay men are still men and many men are obsessed with sex. But regardless of this, it is still an idea that straight men have. And this is the key issue on this point.
#3 Comfort. Let me ask you something. There are showers where I work. They are not “co-ed”. Shouldn’t they be? Would it be alright to demand that women shower with men? That should be fair, right? That would be the right thing to do in a more prefect and fair world. I think most people would be perfectly OK with it. Oh sure, there might be a few cases where some crazy guy would attack a woman. But then, the law would come into play and deal with those rare situations. But, in reality, women would never allow for men to join them in communal showers. They would feel uncomfortable about the uncontrollable gazing eyes of men. It is exactly the same if you have to shower with a gay guy. In boot camp we all shower in the same room. We did that every day. Even with sensitivity training and instruction for all the 80 guys in the company to be open-minded and accepting, no straight guy would ever feel 100% comfortable. And Generals have much too much to worry about and think about. If there is any slight addition to the equation, it is not worth it.
#4 Savagery. This is a point I once made and someone decided to break apart my point sentence by sentence and missed the point. I am characterizing all men in combat and I am not talking about a typical combat situation but in every war that has ever been there have been times when civility breaks down and people become something less than civilized human beings.
When living in a live-and-death environment where you are killing and your buddies are being killed constantly, the social rules that make us civilized break down. It is best, I believe, that in such an environment it is best that everyone is of the same orientation and gender. Otherwise a feeding frenzy takes place because there is no order or care to hold people back from their most primitive actions.
There is that famous case of Jamie Leigh Jones, a contractor, going to the front lines in Iraq. She was not supposed to be among men who felt they might not live the next day and had nothing to lose. She needed reconstructive surgery after the incident.
Someone made the point that these were contractors and not service men that did this crime. That is minutia. Desperate men in desperate situations act in unthinkable ways. If people think it might very well be the last day they have alive, they change and do things you would never expect.
#5 The Military Needs Rednecks. The military needs young men who are young enough to still feel they are invincible. The military needs people who are braver than they are intelligent. The military needs young people who think in simple terms. These simple terms include thinking in prejudicial and stereotypical terms about what it means to be a man and a hero and accepted by society and even by the opposite sex.
But what is more important is that Rednecks are gung-ho. They are focused and spontaneous and act without wasting time thinking. They need to have their way cleared for them to do the horrible job at hand. Adding homosexual comrades into the equation might have an impact in diminishing the efficiency. It is certainly not out of the question to think it would. It is an addition that they should not have to be concerned with just because it would make a more fair human slaughter machine.
Rednecks typically are not tolerant of homosexuals. Rednecks typically avoid gays. The gay population I have heard is only ten percent in San Francisco but they are visible and vocal. I believe it is because of this that I have never heard of a popular country and western bar in San Francisco (well, it might be of a different genre) and there are no truck pulls or monster truck rallies.
#6 Chivalry. When I lived in Austin about 5 years ago there was a local story that was getting a lot of attention and discussion. A police woman was killed in an accident and it was her own male partner that was at fault. In the policeman’s mind chivalry had overruled all his training and male instinct ruled out over rational thought.
What had happened is this. The male officer was in the driver’s seat behind a stopped but running squad car. The suspect was outside and to the left. The female officer was outside on the right side of the car. The suspect suddenly made a motion that he was going to run behind the squad car toward the female officer. The male officer did not have time to think or access the situation. He instinctively wanted to move the car between the two to protect his partner. He would not have done this if his partner was a man. It was chivalry. He had no idea that she was in the middle of moving toward the suspect apprehend him. Thus, she was run over and killed.
For days talk shows and commentators were suggesting that the laws be changed because of the male instinct, chivalry, which seemed to be the root cause of the tragedy. Many people were thinking that men and women should not be paired and serving as partners in dangerous situations on the police force.
Now, I know what you might be thinking. But human sexuality is a complex thing. No two people have the same distinct likes and dislikes and attractions. But there are very fem gay men and there are some otherwise straight men who are to a degree bisexual and would act to protect a fem gay man because on some level they think the he-she is somewhat just as delicate as a she. Do you remember the movie “A Dog Day’s Afternoon”? It is based on a true story. Some men think that all that is needed in a he-she is an operation.
People have used the fact that women now serve in the military now to suggest that my argument that gays should not be in the military for similar reasons is null and void. Just because it is now done does not make it correct. Besides, I still think that it is such that horrible mistakes in judgment are not likely. If so, this should change. And the argument that women serve in harm’s way is non sequitur.
Additionally, if chivalry plays a role in someone deciding who lives in dies, it would be another tragic event and the deciding serviceman would have a hard time explaining his actions to the families of the dead servicemen.
#7 Directions of the Heart. The flip side of chivalry is directions of the heart. Rather than being equal brothers-in-arms, the scales can be tipped if a gay man falls in love with another man in combat. Just as a woman would favor a man who she was in love with, a gay man would instinctively single out a man he had fallen in love with. And we have biased decisions being made similar to the last example.
#8, Camaraderie. There is a bond that is greater and more powerful than brotherhood. It is camaraderie. It is often said that “Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends”. I know, it is from the bible, but, at the same time, the scribe who penned the book of John knew what he was talking about. It is something that you have to feel and if you don’t feel it, you cannot understand it by reading mere words. If you have never been on a war ship or in a tank or on a submarine, you cannot understand what it is like. You have a sense of being an individual but you also have a sense of being a part of a greater group that is bound together tightly. That tight bond is camaraderie. After living together full time you get to know people deeply to their soul and they know you deeply to your soul. You cannot hide secrets. If you don’t get it, just think of The Borg on the TV show “Star Trek: The Next Generation”. You are all so much alike you would give your live for your buddies because they would give their life for you. It is a collective you are bound together and that bond is very strong.
When I served on the USS Kennedy there was a guy who worked with us in the office who seemed to be having difficulty getting along and fitting in. I felt kind of sorry for him. I did not know much later after he was flown off the ship unexpectedly (to me) what was really going on.
He reported for work each day but on the last few days he was not assigned any jobs and he seemed to be sulking a lot. He told me that he had gotten into a fight. He said a redneck was beating him up because he was black. I did not have any reason to doubt him. So I believed him.
After he was gone I found out the truth. It was not because he was black. It was because he had made a pass at the guy and the guy turned to pound his face in. First sailors and then marines came to stop the situation.
The bond of camaraderie was broken. There are 6 thousand men on the aircraft carrier. It is a lot like a floating city. The black guy was in a part of the ship he wasn’t supposed to be in because he was there to meet up with someone but for some reason they did not connect. This is why the story of what happened did not get to me. It did not involve anyone I worked with, except for the black guy. The administrators were to keep it quiet but, after the fact, everyone was talking about it. In my opinion, he had to leave. He had to leave because the camaraderie had been broken. The trust the harassed victim had in his fellow servicemen had been broken. You live together 24 hours a day. You sleep in absurdly tight quarters stacked in bunks three high and they are arranged alternating from shoulder length apart and touching with a thin metal barrier. You shower together. You eat together. You are like Siamese twins. But it is OK because of the camaraderie. No one is supposed to be interested in you sexually. That would break the camaraderie. That would make the unit dysfunctional.
#9 The Great Unknown. Human sexuality is a complicated thing and it is tied into our psyche and our culture. I have heard that other countries are tolerant of homosexuals serving in their military. But that is a different culture. We cannot use another nation as a model as to what would happen in our military. I can think of lots of reasons why we should not try it (I am listing them here) and won’t know for certain unless we try it. But it is not worth the risk.
#10 Concept of Valor. I know that this is going to anger activists, because they will think I am talking in absolutes. You cannot paint people with a wide brush but it has been my experience that the concept of valor is a masculine trait. I am not saying women as a whole do not understand the concept of valor. Many do. But, the majority of women would not lay down her life for another woman or even a man. Some would I am sure. Now I am also not saying that all homosexual men think like women but a lot of them, I imagine would. It is a mixed bag, I know. But there are some men who are transsexual and think like women and I am sure many lack a concept of valor.
#11 Nature. Nature is an interesting concept. How would you define something as being natural? How would you define something as being “unnatural”? To me, the word “unnatural” does not make any sense. If something exists, it is natural. I challenge anyone to tell me of something that is unnatural – as in it exists outside of nature.
In this definition, homosexuality is natural. In fact, it exists in other species as well.
Well, homophobia is natural too. Someone made a big deal when I mentioned that all straight men are homophobic to a degree. They challenged me to show some sort of study. They missed the proverbial boat. So come back to shore so I can clarify. I am not saying that all straight men are prejudiced or intolerant of homosexuals. I am just saying that they would prefer, in an ideal situation, not to have to be concerned with them. For example, I support gay marriage because, frankly, I just don’t care. It is not part of my world. It does not influence me. But this is different. By saying it is OK for open gay men to be in the military, you are forcing straight men to live, sleep, eat and shower with them. Regardless of what they will say, on a visceral level, most of them will not be OK with that. That is nature.
#12 Mathematics. I think the reason why it might be accepted for homosexuals to serve in other countries and not in the United States is because of mathematics. Middle, mainstream America is intolerant and prejudicial to homosexuals. So is the Bible belt. Because of this, the gay culture seems to be pushed to only a handful of cities and districts in the United States. I believe that there are much more men and women who might choose NOT to serve in the military if gays are accepted than the number of gays and tolerant men in women who would join. So I think it is simple mathematics. The military has more to lose by accepting open gays than it has to gain.
#13 The US History. I know, I know, “We hold these truths to be self-evident… all men are created equal” but the truth still remains that this country was founded by religious outcasts. We were founded by basically religious extremists who were probably thought of by their original nations as nut jobs. These extremists were very anti-homosexual in their theology.
It did not vanish or diminish over time. The two major religions born in the United States, Mormonism and Scientology were and are extremely anti-homosexual.
This undercurrent is still alive today. The United States stands out among the other industrialized nations. Most major industrialized nations are largely secular. Among the major industrialized nations, only the United States remains mostly religious in nature and culture.
#14 Extreme Prejudice. In order to function efficiently, the United States has to execute operation under extreme prejudice. You cannot rationally expect to shoe-horn a concept of radical tolerance into the most brutal and intolerant of institutions.
#15 The Question of Dedication It is not being a homosexual that the military dislikes. It is action on it. The two people who I knew of who (I later learned were homosexual) got kicked out because they acted on it. With this in mind, I think that if there was a draft, claiming to be homosexual might not be reasons for them turning you away. Instead they might ask you just to not act on it for the term of your enlistment or service.
That is not as absurd as it might sound to some people. When you sign your name on the many triplicate forms you are legally and physically handing your live over to the military’s hands. You are swearing absolute dedication to them.
This dedication is clearer in some jobs than in others. Let me give you one example. In the Navy Seal training, they give the people who show up for training a bell. All they have to do is ring the bell at any time during the training and you are moved to another job. They only want people with absolute dedication. For the first week, the physical drills are 24 hours a day without sleep.
Gay’s men do not have gay sex. I was shocked to hear and later lean to be true that in the Mormon church, gay men who admit to being attracted to other men are condition to act heterosexual. They are in a sense brain washed and coerced into marrying woman and having kids. If it is possible under extreme religious brainwashing and cohesion that a gay man can submit to living a life of a straight man to please Elohim, then it is not so absurd to ask a gay man not to act on his urges for the few years he is in the military and at least on duty. Not doing so calls into question his dedication to the military and his dismissal is not out of the realm of acceptance for the military.
People have misunderstood my comment “gay men don’t have to have gay sex”. I am not being selective. Straight men don’t have to have sex either.
For the most part, astronauts have been military servicemen. I heard of a blogger who wondered what it was like to have sex in weightlessness and he spent a lot of time interviewing and asking various NASA officials. He wondered with all the months that both men and women have been in orbit, how many times have people had sex. To me, it is no surprise that the answer is zero. Good people in the military are have that kind of dedication.
#16 The AIDS Scare. In the movie, Apollo 13, one of the single astronauts who had sex with a female astronaut groupie before the mission had contracted syphilis. Since the three men were urinating in a shared air-tight bag-like thing, another astronaut contracted syphilis. Now, I know that it is not possible for AIDS to be contracted in such a way. I also know that these astronauts situation was rare and most military men are not going to be peeing in an air-tight bag. But they are constantly and regularly called upon to give blood. During the Lebanese Peace Keeping mission, I was called upon a number of times to donate blood.
Now, I know that straight people can get AIDS and I know that gay activists are going to insist that this is an unfair reason to bar gays from the military. But you know that gays engage in riskier activities for getting AIDS. And you also know that the fear alone, rational or not, is a factor. You will never know for sure if the gay solder let his guard down during leave and engaged in risky behavior. And you will never know for sure if he has AIDS or not. And you never know if and when he will be needed to donate blood.
#17 The Definition of Homosexuality. The actual word, homosexual, is derived from loving the same gender. So why would a man who is sexually attracted to other men agree to shoot and bomb predominately other men. I know the desire to serve your country, but wouldn’t a homosexual of sound mind and conscious choose some other means of serving his country? Wouldn’t a rational person choose some other career that would be more tasteful (for lack of a better word)? A straight man would feel uneasy going on a bombing run if he knew that the overwhelming majority of causalities would be women. What does it say about the character of a gay man who would not be bothered in killing men? This definition of what it means to be a homosexual does not fit well in what would be called upon such a man in time of war.
#18 It Would Be A Gift to Our Enemies. Allowing open gays in the military would be a gift and a great recruitment tool for our radical Islamic enemies. In war, we are supposed to all be willing to make sacrifices. Banning Gays from serving in the military can be one of these sacrifices. It is not unreasonable.
The military does its best to make sure that porn is not taken to or delivered to service men and women in Muslim countries. The military also does its best to make sure that alcohol is not shipped to or delivered to Muslim countries we are stationed in as well. We do our best to adjust. If we are willing to sacrifice by taking something away, we can more easily adjust by refusing to add something to the equation.
People have pointed out to me that the UK is already allowing open gays to serve in their military and so this particular point is not a valid one. But it is valid. You might know that the United States is the third most populated country on earth — and if you count the EU as one country we are fourth. We are also the richest. Of course this means that we are the biggest player in Iraq and Afghanistan. The fact that the UK has a different policy is small change. If we changed, it would be a much bigger deal.
My detractors have equated this to our eating pork. Men are hanged in Iran for being gay and I have heard horror stories in other Islamic nation. The degree of repulsion would be amped up if it was known we embraced homosexuality in a way. Common sense would suggest it would be worse if they knew we eat pork.
#19 Fury. You know the ol’ saying, “Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned”? I know that men and women serve together in the military but I still think they do not serve in close confines where emotion erupt and hearts are broken.
Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned and the same is true for homosexual relationships. We can blame love spats for the breakup of the band “Culture Club”. The emotionally charged eruptions are well noted by band members who have given interviews about the downward spiral that occurred because Boy George was sleeping with the drummer.
The best way to avoid love spats and broken hearts is to try our best to insure that people who serve together in close confines be the same gender and orientation. Police in San Francisco have reported that the same percent of domestic disturbances occur in straight couples homes as those in lesbian homes as in gay men homes.
#20 Sexuality. The military has the legal right to tell straight people whom they can and whom they cannot have sex with. (Naturally it might be assumed that gays are requesting special consideration.) Officers cannot have affairs with enlisted persons. Officers cannot have affairs outside of their marriage (especially if they know top secret information and can be blackmailed). Kicking people out for having gay sex is simply an outcrop of these rules. There are strict rules regarding sex because it is believed that ignoring these rules leads to a breakdown in morale.
There is no civilian job where people can tell you who you can and who you cannot sleep with. But there is not civilian job where you literally sign your life over to your employer.
Let me talk about where “Don’t Ask / Don’t Tell” came from. As I understand it, Bill Clinton promised to lift the ban on open homosexuals serving in the military when he was campaigning for president. His beliefs changed once he became president and he saw the living conditions on an aircraft carrier where men sleep in crowded confines surrounded by each other. He thought then that his campaign promise would not be functional for the military and he invented “Don’t Ask / Don’t Tell” as a compromise.
Years after I got out of the Navy, I heard from someone who just got out of service that women and men serve together on aircraft carriers. He told stories of things that he walked in on when a couple figured no one was in a certain passageway or storage area late at night. I don’t know if he was exaggerating but the stories he told painted a picture of the lowest fraternity party rather than a military ship.
When I grew up there was a friend in the neighborhood who went to a private, all-boys high school. He said that it was necessary to get the kind of education that would lead to a better college and a better life. He was right. The SAT test scores from Christian Brothers High School were way above any other public or private schools. I don’t think there are any all-men colleges but I have heard that women who attend all-women college outperform women at other colleges scholastically.
Sexuality is a distraction. It does not matter if it is an attraction or a repulsion. Human beings have sexual urges that take away from discipline and focus. It does not matter that other countries are integrated. That argument is non sequitur. I imagine that they are integrated because of public pressure and a need for recruitment. It makes the job much more enjoyable if both genders are around. That does not mean that it is better. It is a trade-off. Something is taken away. If we have too much distraction in the military we might be sacrificing our security if we came up with a more determined and focused foe.
© 2009, 2010 William M. Thompson